glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Randomize
