At least make sure they are 18
Why
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Randomize
