Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Randomize
