Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize