Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Randomize