i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
