well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
