Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Dick very happy bro
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
