I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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