Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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