what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
