so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Randomize
