Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
there was a trapeze. enough said
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
