I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
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Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
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She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
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