Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
