I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Come on in and take your pants off
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