I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
