just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize