she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
