Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
