ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
