My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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