Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize