is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
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