yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize
