Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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