Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Randomize