Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
