Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
