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• (269): View more from Michigan

  So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!

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• (774): View more from Massachusetts

  dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian

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• (646): View more from New York

  You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (334): View more from Alabama

  she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.

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• (914): View more from New York

  Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes

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• (219): View more from Indiana

  Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

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• (312): View more from Illinois

  I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.

  (224): View more from Illinois

  Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.

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• (905): View more from Ontario

  Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.

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• (713): View more from Texas

  Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.

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• (305): View more from Florida

  I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.

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• (313): View more from Michigan

  I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.

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