i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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