She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Randomize
