she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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