I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
