am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Drake has all the answers
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
