dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
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All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
The feeling are messing with the penis
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
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