she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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