Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
