PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
