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• (240): View more from Maryland

  No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?

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• (559): View more from California

  I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...

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  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

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• (812): View more from Indiana

  I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.

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• (226): View more from Ontario

  wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?

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• (225): View more from Louisiana

  Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious

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  19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”

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• (406): View more from Montana

  Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.

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• (859): View more from Kentucky

  Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up

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• (512): View more from Texas

  like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies

  (210): View more from Texas

  THE END IS NEIGH

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• (208): View more from Idaho

  I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.

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