Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
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