remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
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theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
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I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
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