Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time

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  (248): I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time http://tfl.nu/04o8
  Replies (7) Good night (1084) Bad night (3454)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen

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  (815): I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen http://tfl.nu/dsay
  Replies (27) Good night (2525) Bad night (2461)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.

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  (704): I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers. http://tfl.nu/zryg
  Replies (18) Good night (831) Bad night (5048)
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  (516): View more from New York

  The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.

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  (516): The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right. http://tfl.nu/nc3r
  Replies (14) Good night (4276) Bad night (1078)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.

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  (813): Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again. http://tfl.nu/0xdw
  Replies (14) Good night (851) Bad night (4390)
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  (254): View more from Texas

  His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!

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  (254): His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!! http://tfl.nu/05kd
  Replies (15) Good night (4992) Bad night (1882)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"

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  (902): You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear" http://tfl.nu/r2vo
  Replies (7) Good night (7109) Bad night (1172)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.

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  (561): i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it. http://tfl.nu/80hm
  Replies (9) Good night (2465) Bad night (1358)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.

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  (816): Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please. http://tfl.nu/1nwj
  Replies (10) Good night (2926) Bad night (896)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.

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  (978): It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking. http://tfl.nu/nj2t
  Replies (5) Good night (1591) Bad night (600)
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.

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  (601): Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though. http://tfl.nu/pqgx
  Replies (20) Good night (3489) Bad night (685)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  He's the conductor of the struggle bus

  (1-413): View more from Massachusetts

  I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS

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  (413): He's the conductor of the struggle bus (1-413): I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS http://tfl.nu/k1kz
  Replies (6) Good night (885) Bad night (420)
• Favorite

  (229): View more from Georgia

  Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.

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  (229): Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time. http://tfl.nu/fz3l
  Replies (2) Good night (619) Bad night (407)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel

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  (603): I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel http://tfl.nu/5thv
  Replies (5) Good night (739) Bad night (348)
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?

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  (763): Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns? http://tfl.nu/frcg
  Replies (2) Good night (354) Bad night (262)

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