no. you can't hotbox the world.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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