wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
