O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
