I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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