from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
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