whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Boobs speak an international language.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Randomize