I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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