With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
